i should have kept them

i always promised
that i would never take
a single second with you
for granted
and i never did
even in the moment
i knew how special
each passing one was
but i am realizing
that it was the inbetween moments
that i didn’t treasure enough
those are the ones
that sneak up
out of nowhere
and steal my breath
for example:
i didn’t realize how much
i would miss
waking up in the morning
and my first thought being about
opening my eyes
and knowing i am loved
that i am someone’s muse
had i realized
i would have kept each waking thought
in my bedside drawer
or tucked them under my pillow
one by one
they vanished
like the december morning fog


December 31, 2019